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the
latest:
Confessions of a Textbook Writer
If you promise not to get too mad, I'll tell you a secret. I used to write textbooks.
Yes, it's true. I helped write those big books that break your back when you carry them, and put you to sleep when you read them. But let me say one thing in my own defense: I never meant for them to be boring!
I used to spend long days in the library, searching for stories to make my history textbooks fun to read. And I filled up notebooks with good ones-funny, amazing, inspiring, surprising, and disgusting stories. But as you've probably noticed, textbooks are filled with charts, tables, lists, names, dates, review questions... there isn't any room left for the good stuff. In fact, every time I tried to sneak in a cool story, my bosses used to drag me to this dark room in the basement of our building and take turns dropping filing cabinets on my head.
Okay, that's a lie. But they could have fired me, right? And I've got a wife and kids to think about.
So here's what I did: Over the years, I secretly stashed away all the stories I wasn't allowed to use in textbooks. I kept telling myself, "One of these days I'm going to write my own history books! And I'll back them with all the true stories and real quotes that textbooks never tell you!"
Well, now those books finally exist. If you can find it in your heart to forgive my previous crimes, I hope you'll give this book a chance. Thanks for hearing me out.
If you promise not to get too mad, I'll tell you a secret. I used to write textbooks.
Yes, it's true. I helped write those big books that break your back when you carry them, and put you to sleep when you read them. But let me say one thing in my own defense: I never meant for them to be boring!
I used to spend long days in the library, searching for stories to make my history textbooks fun to read. And I filled up notebooks with good ones-funny, amazing, inspiring, surprising, and disgusting stories. But as you've probably noticed, textbooks are filled with charts, tables, lists, names, dates, review questions... there isn't any room left for the good stuff. In fact, every time I tried to sneak in a cool story, my bosses used to drag me to this dark room in the basement of our building and take turns dropping filing cabinets on my head.
Okay, that's a lie. But they could have fired me, right? And I've got a wife and kids to think about.
So here's what I did: Over the years, I secretly stashed away all the stories I wasn't allowed to use in textbooks. I kept telling myself, "One of these days I'm going to write my own history books! And I'll back them with all the true stories and real quotes that textbooks never tell you!"
Well, now those books finally exist. If you can find it in your heart to forgive my previous crimes, I hope you'll give this book a chance. Thanks for hearing me out.
The
Nortorious
Benedict
Arnold wins
the YALSA
Award for
Excellence
in
Nonfiction!